Burn! Burn! Burn!

My dresser is the worst investment I've ever made. I have to use my screws, hammer, and nails on a weekly basis to fix the hunk of junk only to end up in the same place I was a week prior: with a dresser that doesn't work. It makes it very difficult to keep my room clean and my belongings in place. I would like to take a match to it's light wood knobs and slowly watch it burn into flames that release joy and pleasure from all of the nights of cursing, anxiety, and time it's cost me. Maybe I'd even brand it "I am a waste of good materials". It'd be like the ending scene in "Wicker Man" but there'd be no human in the wood; so really, it wouldn't be anything like "Wicker Man".

This is symbolic of me with the dresser:



I really need to invest in a dresser that works.

Dirty hair and fingernails

I'm really confused by this new "fashion" I've been seeing a lot of lately, specifically on women, of not wearing makeup and looking like one has not bathed for 8 days. It's really unattractive and makes the world not want to touch nor be near the entire group of people engaging in this wretched subculture. What's wrong with bathing and not wearing unflattering vergeonhooker clothing? It is very dirty.

Joy!

As time passes and these life changes occur, I'm sitting back, relaxing and understanding things about myself, life, and the unbelievable amount of beauty in human kind.

It's been something that I've been struggling, so to say, with for a little while. And then something happened and I'm finding myself wrapped in this moment of life feeling completely joyous about the capacity and allowance of human beings to experience such an insane depth of beauty in all that is around us. In life, in the universe, in all that is. And to experience this beauty in such a free form, it's so magnificent!

Starting to understand what life is...ok, that statement is way too bold make. But I'm starting to understand why we pursue these crazy aspirations, why we make the decisions we do. And this thought, feeling, whatever the hell you want to call it, is probably something I'm going to be chiving the rest of my life.

Unrelenting, unfaltering, unwaivering. Totally consumed with being.