Fugue and Prelude

You know you've had a weekend when you wake up and your tongue feels numb...from smoking cigs, not from acting like a hook. The past week I've been experiencing some issues with sneezing when I come to work and I cannot figure it out; no allergies, it's clean in our little patient room converted into office, so what the hell is possibly irritating my damn sinuses? Could someone please assess this situation? This sneezing got me thinking about all of those old urban legends 'n' myths 'n' shit and I do recall being told that it was illegal to sneeze while driving because humans cannot sneeze with their eyes open so it would obtruct their view. Sadly, I believed this tall tale and spread it like wildfire. I believed this until I turned 16 and started driving and of course I had to fucking sneeze a few times in my car and nothing happened, I drove like a pro therefore that was a bullshit myth.

There were other great myths that I've recently resurrected from the grave (aka my memory)and found out that none of them were true. Richard Gere and the gerbil, the slap bracelets colors symbolizing how far you'll go with a dude, the cooks jizzing in the Alfredo Sauce at Olive Garden, pretty much every single fast food restaurant had some nasty legend attached to it, the one about the lady having sex with a lobster and giving birth to mud worms, etc. I wish shit like that was still getting spread, well, I'm sure it's still being spread around I'm just not hearing about it. Anyway, I did some research and all of those are fake. WTF? LET DOWN.